When I look back over the time when I was 18, I remember the joys of that time – when mostly my thoughts were going forward, guessing, wondering and making false assumptions, plus the frustrations and the fears. Now, with the experience of all the time afterwards – so easy to say-I’d treasure much more the joys, the excitement, the adventure, and make much more positive use of the fears and frustrations (with a healthy speed limit on those false assumptions!)
It’s so long now since I’ve felt that rising joy of life course through my nerve endings, and I’d foster and develop those feelings far more if I could – I’d love to have those now. The confidence I have then was so different from now – so untempered by experience – not a dais strong enough to support me; just one of which to fall!
Everything was heightened then and while that feeling could not be sustained for ever, I should perhaps have held it more closely to my life for long and use Its fuel to aid and strengthen and give colour to the coming years.
But, even as I write that last paragraph, I realise that, in fact, I did do that and my 18-year old self was, in fact, my good parent for the remainder of my life to come. We cannot, and maybe, should not wish to change what has been – while so much is yet to follow. In a sense, I am always on the edge of being 18…
I am 49 years old and have been living with Progressive-relapsing Multiple sclerosis (MS) for around 10 years. I have received a lot of help from INS and now I, in turn, devote a lot of my time to them. I’m a member of their INSight group (a service users’ forum) and I help them with their medical student training (by talking to the students and also by helping set up seating).INS has helped me with physiotherapy and occupational therapy, and I have also used their counselling service on a number of occasions. The rehabilitation assistants have worked with me in the gym at INS, and basically give me a good reason to keep on living, even if it is with an incurable illness like MS.All at INS understand the difficulties involved. They do not belittle you in any way and they are all very friendly.